(no subject)

[eyeonyou]

[Fury has found himself in possession of a small kitten, currently doing its utmost best to knock all the papers from his desk. don't ask why he has a kitten; it's not important. what is important is he has one, and it is wreaking havoc in his office, and he can't decide whether to shoot it or what because there is a goddamn kitten mucking up his business

you have been forewarned]

Comments

[ofafeather]

Hey, Boss---

[What.]

...you were getting lonely, weren't you? That's exactly what's going on here.

[eyeonyou]

Can it, Morse. You know full well what's going on here.

[ie: your daughter]

[ofafeather]

You shouldn't have told her yes.

[eyeonyou]

I never gave the go-ahead to have a cat in my office.

[ofafeather]

She wouldn't have done it without asking first.

[technetronic]

[Bursts into the room about to launch into some spiel that Fury doesn't care for, but Tony finds very important, except...

Kitten.

He is speechless for all of five seconds. Greatest five seconds of your life, right there.]

You've only got the one patch so you should be able to see.

[Covers one eye and yep, he can still see the cat.]

[eyeonyou]

No one asked you, Stark. [and oh he is glaring with that one eye, don't you doubt it]

[technetronic]

[Tony has had possibly too much exposure to that glare that he talks right through it or he's got no sense of self-preservation.]

Oh I'm sorry, are we going to continue to ignore the elephant-- or shall I say cat in the room?

Didn't peg you for a cat person.

[eyeonyou]

[he will just keep glaring anyway because it's his default expression]

That's because I'm not.

Since you insist on noticing it, you're welcome to keep it.

[technetronic]

[Woah woah, back up. He doesn't want the cat.]

And deprive you of the light in your life? I think not. Besides, it adds a little... something to this room.

[tiptoeing]

Bruce avoided S.H.I.E.L.D. HQ as much as possible; Fury's office, in particular. But he'd been called in for his expertise in nuclear physics again, and was there to discuss the details. Natasha had reassured him there would be no cages involved this time, but he wasn't entirely convinced.

Not that he wouldn't be wary even if she was telling the truth. His past experience with General Ross made dealing with any branch of the government a little difficult, to say the least. But now, as an Avenger, as a S.H.I.E.L.D. asset, he didn't have much of a choice in the matter.

All of his thoughts on the matter were completely derailed when he saw a tiny kitten on Fury's desk. He raised an eyebrow.

"Please tell me that's not Loki in cat form," he said, dryly. He wouldn't be surprised, if it was.

[eyeonyou]

Fury was currently trying to salvage some paperwork said kitten had knocked off his desk when Bruce came in, dry quip and all. The Director managed to look at him over the lip of his desk, the kitten batting a pen around like it was going out of style.

"Loki didn't cause this much damage." Fury sighed, sitting up again and rubbing at the bridge of his nose. "But no, I haven't seen our demi-god trickster in a while. This is just a run-of-the-mill nuisance."

[tiptoeing]

Bruce chuckled, and picked the little terror up off the desk, gently holding him in his arms. The kitten looked a little uncertain when he sniffed him...which was to be expected, considering.

But then he settled down, and started to purr. "I don't know, I think he's kind of cute," he replied. "Does he have a name?"

[eyeonyou]

"No." For being a giant rage monster, Banner had a way with animals. Fury would need to keep this in mind for any future reference. For the time being, though, he simply sat back and watched. "Got any ideas?"

[tiptoeing]

"What about Schrödinger?" he asked, innocently. Tony would get the reference, but Fury might not. Which might be amusing, if Tony found out. Of course, Tony finding out Fury had a kitten would be amusing enough on its own. Fury would never hear the end of it.

NOT. SORRY.

[nestling]

I don't think your desk is a good place for a kitten.

[Way to state the obvious, kid.]

GET OUT

[eyeonyou]

I hadn't noticed. [deadpan]

NO :|

[nestling]

Maybe you should put her somewhere else.

>|

[eyeonyou]

How about she goes back to your house?

:D

[nestling]

My mom said she couldn't stay.

[arrowminded]

[He's not looking forward to a meeting with Fury, even after countless debriefings and psych evals. In Barton's mind they're just formalities and protocol; they could never get to the real root of the problem.

Which is this: How do you face a man you shot in the chest while under the spell of a psychotic alien demi-god? Even S.H.I.E.L.D.'s SOPs can't come close to touching that one.

Clint needn't have worried though, because Fury's definitely got other troubles on his mind. Unbidden, one side of his mouth quirks up.]

Bad time?

[eyeonyou]

[truth be told, Fury looks forward to these meetings about as much as Clint does. he doesn't want to be giving out psych evals and performance evaluations to one of his best agents. he wants said agent out in the field where they both know he'll handle better

but that's not how protocol dictates, and even Fury can only pull so many strings

thankfully (?) they're both distracted from the general task at hand, and he gives Clint a dull look]

That depends. You interested in a cat?

[arrowminded]

I'm guessing I'm not the first person you've asked that.

Looks like it's pretty attached to you already.

[eyeonyou]

Unfortunately. On both accounts.

You know I can't keep it here.

[arrowminded]

Really? It's gotta be at least as capable as your last secretary. And we could use a mascot around here.