(no subject)

[gotshotgun]

[Sarge is standing around a table conveniently located smack dab between Red and Blue base. don't ask how it got there.

...or how it has streamers considering it's outdoors

all that matters is there's a giant table covered in food and assorted drinks and Sarge is putting the finishing touches on some of the decorations. you'd be surprised how hard it can be to decorate while holding a shotgun, but he manages]

All right you dirtbags, come and get it.

Except Grif. He can keep watch. And no one touch my pie.

[there are seven pies. choose wisely]

Comments

[gotshotgun]

It's not my fault your stomach is about as strong as women's lace. Now get out there and patrol.

[runawayandlive]

Patrol where? [gestures allllllllll around them] You set the table up in the middle of the damn canyon! I can see everything from here!

[gotshotgun]

Oh yeah? And can you see inside all those caves on the rockface?

[runawayandlive]

Yes. [a lie, but he knows what are in caves and fuck those caves. he's not going in them] And if any of those assholes want pie, they can come out and fucking get it. So I am going to patrol from right here. [meaning, he'll do nothing]

[gotshotgun]

[and Sarge does what he does best: he levels his shotgun at Grif] I do believe I gave you an order, soldier.

Also I left some creamer back at base. You can pick it up while you're scouting.

[runawayandlive]

[and Sarge is keeping him from doing what he does best--and he isn't surprised in the least]

Fine. [starts walking. slowly.] But I don't know what you want creamer for. We're outta coffee.

[gotshotgun]

No we're not. I've had a stash hidden away for months and made sure no one else told you. Besides, I can use it for some of this frosting I'm finishing up.

[runawayandlive]

[he's kinda silent for a second, trying not to think about all the times he could have used that coffee.]

Come on, Sarge. "Coffee-flavored frosting"?! Who the hell would even like that shit other than caffeine addicts and Starbucks workers?

[don't get him wrong, he likes his coffee, but he likes his frosting as well. and a guy has to have some standards when it comes to the two.]

[gotshotgun]

Who said anything about coffee-flavoured frosting? I just want it to be nice and creamy. What else is creamer supposed to be for?

[runawayandlive]

Coffee. Creamer goes in coffee, as does sugar, milk, and pastries. Or it would if I knew where the damn coffee was!

[gotshotgun]

How fortunate you'll never know where I keep it. [and even if he did, Sarge has it booby trapped]